NKOTB poses!

Wowwwweeeeeeeee I saw NKOTB tonight and they were MAGNIFICENT! They are still HANGIN' TOUGH after all these years and step by step I feel in love with them all over again tonight, they sure have the right stuff!! <--there are some NKOTB puns hidden in that sentance for you readers with a careful eye for words and a beautiful ear for music!

My favourite part of the evening was when they all danced and then took a photo and put it up on the big screen! Some of them were doing headstands and figure skater poses and breakdance moves and there was fire and it was a POSE-OFF! Jon Knight won the pose off because he was so awesome!!

As a tribute I would like to show you my own contribution to the POSE-OFF if I were to join the next tour. Mine would be in front of some fireworks; fireworks are splendid and I feel really add to the excitement of my hypothetical pose. Enjoy!!

Lost and Found EP

O, how exciting, Royal Wood's new EP, Lost and Found, arrived in my mail today and even though I posted once today and have a full social life that makes it difficult to post twice in one day, I have to report that it is most lovely indeed.

I am particularly thrilled by his decision to include a string ensemble on his new EP. I wish I had a string ensemble of my very own. We would do so many exhilarating things together!!

I would get them to go to Canada's Wonderland (the amusement park) with me and we would all ride the Behemoth together! We would serenade everyone in line. Also I could test my theory that if you bring a cello on the roller coaster, it results in a lightly damaged but more "bad ass" cello!

Clap clap!!

Many of my friends in real life (“The Meat World”) know that I am very excited that one of my most beloved of talented bands, Hey Rosetta!, is returning to London, Ontario to play in April!

One of my favourite things about going to their shows is clapping along to the song Another Pilot. A unicorn’s hooves make a majestic clapping sound compared to a human’s…we might compare it to the difference between a timpani and a snare drum. The timpani is so much more impressive, and bands are always pleased to hear a unicorn clapping along at their shows.

Today I was thinking: more songs should have hand clapping in them!! Queen’s We Will Rock You is an excellent one that you can also foot stamp to. Cecilia by Simon & Garfunkel, Clap for the Wolfman by the Guess Who, and Let X = X by Laurie Anderson are all perfect for clapping.

But why do art music and opera have so little clapping?

Today I was listening to Fauré’s beautiful Requiem and thinking that the Pie Jesu could really use some clapping. For those of you who are not musically educated, Wikipedia says a Requiem is a mass for the dead, and I am pretty sure that ghosts like hand clapping just as much as those of us who are alive!!

Another famous piece that could use hand clapping is Beethoven’s 5th Symphony. Dun dun dun dunnnn *CLAP CLAP* would be so fantastic!!

I hope that more of you will blog about this issue and perhaps we could start a grassroots movement for clapping in classical music. One of my life goals, in fact, is “start a grassroots movement for something”.

Life goals for me!!

Sometimes I feel like I am a bit of a slacker, particularly when I sleep in late on a Wednesday. So I decided to set some life goals!!

My first life goal is a doozy, you will be very impressed.

I resolve to, sometime in my life, cause a time paradox!!! My first idea to do this is to build a time machine, kidnap Michael J. Fox (the actor), take him back in time, and trick him into killing his father!!

I will do this by going back to the time his father was 5 years old. I will point to his father in a kindergarten classroom and say "Look, Michael J. Fox, we have gone back in time and that man is actually a young Hitler!!! He has snuck into a Canadian kindergarten classroom! You should kill him!"

This will cause a time paradox. MJF and I will celebrate by singing Johnny B. Goode.

Or wait. WILL he still exist after the time paradox? Perhaps we should celebrate first.

Also I will amend my goal to say "Wait for someone else to build a time machine, then steal it and kidnap Michael J. Fox (the actor)". This seems more efficient than building one myself.

I have some other life goals but thinking up this one has worn me out. I will go take a nap.

Chuck or Nate??

The previous post got me thinking: Whom do I adore most on Gossip Girl, Chuck or Nate?

Obviously in an ideal world, I would get to have both of them, but I should be prepared in case one day I have to choose.

I have formulated a chart of the best things about them, to help me decide.

Chuck:

• Excellent at sex
• Good buddy for planning crime
• Beautiful fashion sense
• Owns a HOT strip club for if I want to show off my moves in public
• No Vanessa germs

Nate:

• Very pretty
• Probably fewer STDs
• Athletic
• Extremely mellow because of all the pot
• Less silly name than "Chuck"

If you know any smart rats, please ask them to visit me

I wish I had some rats from NIMH. I could get them to do so many interesting things, like clean my house! They could use my extra toothbrushes as brooms and sweep my kitchen floor, and sing a merry song while they did it.

(Should I tag this post with "decorating"? Or give it a new tag like "cleanliness"? I feel as though I would not use that tag often enough to justify its creation.)

Also, I'm pretty excited for a new episode of Gossip Girl tomorrow! I have no one to discuss the show with, but I bet if I had some NIMH rats, they would be fans. I wonder if they would like Chuck or Nate better? Both boys are so dreamy. I suppose is doesn't matter, as long as they are not Dan fans.

If they were Dan fans, I would have to make them sleep outside. If they were Vanessa fans I might "accidentally" flush them down the toilet.

A problem with my new gazebo

It was so gloriously warm out today that I decided to celebrate by building a lovely gazebo for my backyard! It took me most of the day. I wished to be frugal, so I mainly used sticks I found in the woods by the Thames.

I also made myself a virgin margarita (even though I am not a virgin myself) to enjoy in my new gazebo! I decided that I would work all day and then rest at 7pm, just before the sun would go down.

However, when I went to check the time to see if I could rest yet, I noticed a slight problem. I had built my gazebo so that it shades my sundial!!! Now how am I supposed to tell the time??

(I know what you are all wondering. Prior to the gazebo's construction, how did I tell the time at night and during cloudy days? Obviously during those periods I "guesstimated".)

By my calculations, the sundial should be free of shadow from around noon to 2pm, when the sun is most overhead. However, noon to 2pm are not my favourite times of the day. Sure, they are lovely and I appreciate all times, but I truly adored watching my sundial hit 4:20pm.

For those of you who are not "in the know", that is a secret code relating to an illicit form of weed that I smoked once at a Pink Floyd concert. I have always enjoyed my sundial reminding me of my bad boy past!

I suppose there is nothing to be done and I must burn down my gazebo. I will do it tomorrow. Tonight I am sad, and also I am out of gasoline to fuel the fire.

ShimmerShine Moondreams: Quirky and Alone

Followers of my most esteemed blogging adventure may know that I have been single since this blog began over a year ago, despite my efforts at seeking out romance or carnal interactions. So, I have decided to give up.

Yes, that is correct, I am no longer searching for love! Please pass this information on to anyone particularly charming whom you may know who likes the strong independent types such as myself.

In fact, I have decided to become a Quirkyalone:

Quirkyalone noun/adj.
A person who has the capacity to enjoy single life (but is not opposed to being in a relationship) and generally prefers to be alone rather than dating for the sake of being in a couple.

I feel this is a beautiful goal and I would also like to emphasize the bit in parentheses.

To prove to my potential mates who value independence that I am an excellent catch, I have taken the Quirkyalone quiz! Here are my answers:

1. Do you like walking (alone) at night?

Yes, I am fascinated by the interactions between strangers that play out before me. In fact, I do like to walk alone and look at the moon and the way the snow/rain glitters. I think of walking alone in utilitarian terms: It's a matter of getting from point A to point B. Long walks alone at night do not appeal to me. They seem dangerous and/or boring.

O, I pick the option involving glitter!!!! 2. Has anyone ever called you quirky?

Yes, people often do. Once or twice. No. Many times. I have also been called charming, handsome, romantic, and trustworthy.

3. Which do you have more of, numerically speaking?

Past boy/girlfriends. Current amigos. This is hard because I feel that the entire world is my amigos and my potential future boyfriends or girlfriends. Since time is truly relative, this means the entire world is also my past boy/girlfriends! You can see from this answer that I am also a philosopher and deep thinker, which I feel makes me more attractive than just having a pretty face and large genitalia.

4. Did you go to your senior prom?

Yes. I went in with a date. Yes. I went alone/with friends. No. No prom for me. I love proms. I did not have one of my own (alas my basement is not large enough to hold a prom) but I have been to other people's, and generally I wear taffeta to prom, with sparkles and some perfume that smells like gardenias.

5. How often do you pursue extracurricular activities outside of work?

I write, draw, organize, throw pottery, sing, or cycle a few times a week. I take classes every so often. Not so much these days. I am unsure as to whether "extracurricular activities" is a sexual reference.

6. What kind of movie would you most like to see?

Romantic comedy. Indie movie about a fucked-up family. Action thriller. O, I would pick #1 and #3! I loved all of the gore and action in Watchmen but I truly feel the film would have been improved with more romantic comedy. Why could they not give Rorschach a love interest????

7. What is your chosen family?

Friends. Significant other. Pets. All of the above.

8. Would you rather be lonely alone or lonely together?

Lonely alone. Lonely together. Neither?!?!? What a silly question.

9. Would you rather have a predictable vibrator or an inconsistent partner? (If you are a man, assume you are a woman.)

Vibrators are a woman's best friend. Vibrator, please. Inconsistent partner. I prefer the human touch - even if he or she is not that dextrous. O, an ambidextrous person please.

10. Have you ever gone to a movie alone?

Never. No, but I would try. A few times. More than a few times. More than a few times, but I rarely leave alone!!

11. What is the longest you have gone without a "significant other"?

1 - 3 months 4 - 8 months 8 months - 2 years Two years plus I would prefer not to answer this because the answer is somewhat embarrassing.

12. When you go to a bar to meet somebody, whom are you looking for?

A nice person to talk to. Your next boy/girl friend. A certain feeling of possibility. I was going to say #1 but truth be told, I am going through a bit of a bad boy faze. So perhaps #3, if the "certain feeling of possibility" means "a certain feeling of possibly ending up on a motorcycle smoking cigarettes and listening to a badass band such as Sabbath".

13. On the way to work, you spot a perfect JCrew couple holding hands. What do you feel?

Nothing. That's nice. It must be so easy for you.

O, how wonderful!! When I see couples holding hands I do a little dance in thanks to the universe for making love available to each and every one of us. Also sometimes if they are holding hands particularly tightly, I like to play Red Rover! I yell RED ROVER RED ROVER LET SHIMMERSHINE COME OVER and then I run at them as fast as I can! The couple looks so startled and surprised, tee hee hee, but it is almost always a pleasurable surprise!

As you can see, I am both quirky and alone, so if you know someone else who is also like this, please tell them to give me a telephone call!

Quick report from the Watchmen midnight showing!

Just so you all know, everyone at the cinema adored my Dr. Manhattan costume!!!

Counting down to Watchmen!

Eeeeeeeeee I am so excited for the midnight showing of Watchmen on Thursday night/Friday morning!!!!!

I am particularly excited by the hope that some of the heroes from the film might be there! In particular I am hoping to meet Silk Spectre II, as I am somewhat smitten with her and would like to know which of her feels more like silk, her hair or skin!!

I do realize that there are a lot of midnight showings across the country, so the Watchmen (and my lovely Watchwoman!) may not be able to come to all of them. They will have hard choices to make! It occurs to me that perhaps if someone were in peril at my cinema, the Watchmen will have to come!!

So I am making plans to cause a bit of a commotion during the previews (not during the film itself, of course). Here are my ideas so far. Some of them are problematic so I am still considering:

• Flood the cinema with water and then release some sharks! (This is one of my favourite plans but I'm not sure if I will be able to find the right kind of chum to make the sharks go extra-chompy)


• Jump up and down a bunch to start an earthquake! (I could even sabotage the cinema's ceiling beforehand so that it collapses. Perhaps I will drill some holes? If I spin around I think my horn could work as a drill bit)


• Godzilla attack! (He owes me a favour but I'm not sure if it's big enough to drag him out of his hibernation if it is still below -10°C)


• Hijacking of the snack stand by terrorists, or perhaps by a unicorn dressed up as a terrorist (I have some old socks that I can use for a terrorist mask but I can't decide if I should wash them first)