An excerpt from my screenplay

Hi everyone! In addition to poetry, which I have a great deal of experience with as an amateur poet, I also am currently working on a screenplay! The screenplay is inspired by the idea of my good friend Garli.

I thought I would share an excerpt with you. Enjoy!

FADE IN:

EXT. CITY OF ANGELS – DAY

Dusty city street, bustling crowds in the background. UNICORN DETECTIVE, a white unicorn in a trench coat, stands under a broken streetlight.

UNICORN DETECTIVE (V.O.)

It was a hot day in the big city, I remember like it was yesterday. The sun shone down like the light of the angels, and a rainbow burst through the fog of my mind like a warm friend blowin’ me kisses. I thought to myself, “Oh Sammy, when ya gonna realize that dames is poison?” and then I remembered my love ain’t a dame, he’s a guy unicorn and oh wow I see him coming now and his black mane shines most splendidly like obsidian under the light of the sun!

EVIL UNICORN, wearing leather pants, approaches.

UNICORN DETECTIVE (V.O.)

He sauntered toward me takin’ a drag of his cigarette and blowin’ the smoke in a hazy circle around his horn. I was impressed when the smoke turned into a circle of tiny hearts but I sneered at him, keepin’ my cool.

EVIL UNICORN

Well, if it ain’t the hero of the hour.

UNICORN DETECTIVE

I arrest thee in the name of justice!

EVIL UNICORN

...but I love you?

UNICORN DETECTIVE

O ho! If only I could believe you lied, but alas the trusting portion of my soul feels your declaration of love to be the truth!

EVIL UNICORN

It is the truth.

TO BE CONTINUED...

Exciting news!

Today I discovered that a unicorn horn can unlock a chastity belt!

Goodbye poems to my love

My love Jessica (see previous post) is leaving me for the summer and I was so overcome with swirling emotion today that I of course wrote her a poem!

But but but, there is something more special than usual about my poetry today, because the emotion was so great that one poetry form could not contain it!

See first the original poem in my patented Haiku cycle, and then THE SAME POEM in limerick form!!

on the day you leave me, Jessica
a haiku cycle
by Prince Shimmershine Moondreams, amateur poet

dreams found in spring nights
warmer now, though bittersweet
summer's beginning

birds fly home, singing
magnolia trees blossom
in empty backyards

why empty? you're gone
flown half a country away
planting our future

oh brave tree grower!
alone in the woods you sing
of sycamore trees

wolves and bobcats too
you recall, fond, our duet
and cry tears for me

~~~~~

on the day you leave me, Jessica
a limerick
by Prince Shimmershine Moondreams, amateur poet

there existed a human called jess
next to her other creatures seemed less
she ran off to plant trees
and left me begging "please!"
all alone, my poor heart's in a mess

What would NPH do?

Oh my gosh what a most excellent point!

But this leads to the question, "What WOULD Neil Patrick Harris, the great actor and teenage doctor who melted the hearts of young unicorns everywhere, what WOULD he do?"

Because I am honestly, genuinely not certain. And he will not return my most polite phone calls.

Boycott Ryan Adams!

So guys I have some seriously disappointing news for those of you who are fans of alt-country songwriter RYAN ADAMS.

Some of you may know that I was a HUGE (I mean hugest of huge!) fan of his. I thought the dulcimer tone of his voice was most becoming and I very much appreciated that he rarely washed his hair because I do feel that sometimes society imposes baths on all of us and although as you all know, I adore baths, what if people don't? Why do they have to bathe? It seems unfair.

But alas my love affair with Ryan Adams came to an end today.

I was watching clips online of a concert of his and after playing WHEN THE STARS GO BLUE (a most poetic and beautiful song and so my heart breaks to type this!!!) he noted that he wrote that song and many people covered it, so it has made him rich, and

I wrote that [profanity] song, and I have a pool made out of unicorn bones because of that song.

At first I thought "Oh wow that is so awesome! I am glad because this is one of my favourite songs so yay for him being successful!" and then I rewound the video:

I have a pool made out of unicorn bones

UNICORN BONES??

Oh Ryan Adams, how could you?

How could you?????

My self-portrait

Oh gosh guys so I almost forgot to share this with you!

I am taking a DIGITAL PAINTING CLASS. I just started. I am very excited. For our first assignment we were asked to create a self-portrait using digital art!

My art instructor Miss Celia Steppenwolf appeared quite pleased with my first attempt. She told me it was "Jolly good work!" (Miss Steppenwolf is British) and she thought the touch of raspberry bubble bath in the digital painting was a particularly meaningful inclusion.

Miss Steppenwolf even said that if she were to compare music to art, that one day I could possibly (with much training of course) become the NICKLEBACK OF DIGITAL PAINTING.

I am so excited!

Here is my self-portrait, I hope you all enjoy it:

A humble suggestion to city council

Today I was thinking about tourism and my most fine home city of LONDON, CANADA. Sometimes I think we do not have enough tourists!

London, Canada likes to call itself THE FOREST CITY. Perhaps because we have several trees.

I think this IS a lovely name and cannot find fault with the most esteemed personages who selected this name. However, it occurs to me that perhaps we could attract more tourists with one simple change.

The change is this:
Instead of calling ourselves THE FOREST CITY, how about THE MAGICAL FOREST CITY?

I think this will increase tourism immensely!

After thinking of this idea I sat down immediately and wrote 256 letters to city council. However, I forgot to buy stamps so I could mail my letters!!

Does anyone know how to make stamps?

Thank you for your assistance!

Would you eat chips at an orgy?

I feel sometimes that in order to truly be a serious blogger on the INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY, one must be edgy and youthful! Certainly I would not want my blog, PRINCE SHIMMERSHINE MOONDREAMS' BLOGGING ADVENTURE to be dismissed as fluffy or worse, uncool.

Therefore, I have chosen as today's discussion topic to respond to the edgy question : Would you eat chips at an orgy?

Where did this come from, you wonder. Well, I was listening to a lovely recording of a live show by MATT NATHANSON who is a most handsome and desirably glorious emotive musician who plays the 12-string guitar (12 is a FANTASTIC NUMBER) and sings! Sometimes he sings rock covers!

In this recording he is singing Livin' On A Prayer (Whooa-ohhhh!!!) and some people in the audience were not participating in the singing along (my favourite part) so he has this to say:

I look around and there's still people that just don't want to [profanity] sing

People that go to the orgy just to eat chips and watch other people masturbate each other

You know what I'm saying? That's not good

Who the [profanity] wants to be somebody being literally, this person is sitting at the orgy and some one's like, "Hey, I need some one to stick a finger up my [profanity]" and this person's like "No thanks, I'm eating chips."

So this had me thinking. What is wrong with chips at orgies?

I honestly truly would not have a serious issue with this practice. In fact, I am in favour! However, I would not wish to be invited to any orgies in the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. You see, in that country they do not have my favourite chips:

• dill pickle chips
• all-dressed chips
• ketchup chips

And so I feel orgies in America must be less tasty.

But what happens, you ask, if I am invited to an American orgy??? What would I do?

First, do not worry! My satyr friends are actually quite allergic to sparkles, so I would not be invited to their orgies. If for some reason I were, I would simply and very politely turn down the invitation, and send a Thank You card.

Because I know that orgies are very personal, this may not be enough to show my appreciation, so I would make a friendship bracelet for everyone at the event and send them in advance.

My plea to humankind re: dancing

Tonight I went to see a most keen pop-folk singer named BASIA BULAT at a local club. I was very impressed by her assortment of musicians and how they all fit on the tiny stage! I am sure they hired special personage placement engineers to figure out where each musician should stand so as not to knock another one off the stage.

However, my BLOG ENTRY today is not to sing Miss Bulat's praises (although that would be a most lovely BLOG ENTRY indeed) but to wonder about her audience!

As my good friend the mermaid WaterfallSplash and I were pirouetting and shimmying and doing some most excellent line dancing (GRAPEVINE WHOOOOO!!) we noticed something very strange!

NO ONE ELSE WAS DANCING.

What was happening? we wondered. Had there been a leak of nerve gas that caused instant paralysis? Were only mermaids and unicorns immune? We sniffed the air...no, we could not smell anything, and when I asked at the bar they swore there was no paralyzing agent in their drinks.

So why the lack of dancing?? Are humans really this inhibited? Are they frightened and believe their dancing skills are not up to par with my own??

I do feel that not dancing when surrounded by live music is akin to not twirling when you find yourself amid a shower of sparkles, or not singing when you are taking a jaunty stroll in the rain. It is like telling one half of your soul to be quiet when it wants to scream cries of wonder and joy with the other half that is already screaming cries of wonder and joy!

So my encouragement to humankind at live music shows: Dance! I know the cliche is to dance "like no one is watching" but I say dance like EVERYONE is watching, because then everyone will see you and be impressed by your forward-thinking and dance too! And then everyone will be dancing! And it will be marvellous!!!