Olympic 'shipping

I am a huuuge fan of open water marathon swimming, the newest Olympic medal sport! Though I will admit I was a bit disappointed to see the 10km races taking place in a man-made lake of 28 degrees Celsius rather than the ocean with the additional dangers jellyfish and giant squid, my feelings were quickly soothed by the romance involved.

I do love a good romance! Or a bad one! Oh indeed bad ones can be delicious, which is why I spent four hours reading The Dumpster today, and weeping for all of the lost love in the world. Cathartic!

My favourite secret romance in open water swimming is that between Keri-Anne and Cassandra, the two British women.

These women were swimming in the lead, breast to breast the entire 10km until the very end when the results were:

GOLD - Larisa Ilchenko, Russia, 1:59:27.7
SILVER - Keri-Anne Payne, Great Britain, 1:59:29.2
BRONZE - Cassandra Patten, Great Britain, 1:59:31.0

I was in so much shock I screamed and my cellmate Fat Lip Sal called for the guards because he thought I had accidentally shot myself again! (Sal is truly a sweetheart.)

I thought and thought about why the lovely British couple missed out on gold--what mistake had they possibly made? And then it occurred to me...what if it wasn't a mistake? What if it was...a noble sacrifice?

So I wrote a speculative fanfic that I hope will explain to all of you open water swimming fans what happened. And I hope you will cherish it, for I truly believe that fans of open water swimming are also fans of romance. It is from the point of view of Keri-Anne Payne.

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Open Water, Open Hearts
by ShimmerShine Moondreams, Unicorn Prince

As we rounded the turn into the final lap, Cassie and I were in sync, our arms sweeping the water as one, our breath flowing, our hearts beating, souls rejoicing.

We were in the lead, and not just like rabbits, pitter-patting faster like our hearts nearing climax, setting a pace too fast to be maintained. No, we were strong, beautiful women, swimming for our lives, our loves, our country. We were going to win! We were going for the gold!

And then my left arm missed a beat, my heart flipped into my stomach, my thoughts veered off course...like I'd missed a gulp and go, the feeding stick, hard and long and brutal, dropping red gel into the ocean, my joy bleeding out like gel in the water surrounding me.

We were going for the gold, I had thought. We. But there is only one gold in the 10km marathon. And there are two of us. Two bodies, though our souls were twined together.

I flashed back to before the race...

"Oh Keri, that tickles!" Cassie giggled as I marked her body with the grease pen. I smiled naughtily at her, thinking of where else we had used that pen the night before.

"I love you," I whispered breathily into her ear.

"Oh, I love you so much!" Cassandra cried, and dipped her fingers in the Vaseline, creaming it around my neck with gentle fingers so I wouldn't get chafing as we swam. "I wish we could both win gold, though I know you are the better swimmer and so deserve it, my love, my dearest..."

"Oh sweetheart, I may be the stronger swimmer, but in life, I slip stream behind you...you let me carry on." I slipped a gel pack under her armpit and with that sensual movement, I whispered in her ear tonight "My love, this evening I will love you so deeply you will come like an 11 on the Beaufort Wind Force Scale, that is to say, exceptionally high waves of passion, at 11.5 metres high, like a violent storm..."

...and then I was out of my flashback and back into the race. Cassie and I were still tied for lead.

I knew what I had to do. Either we would both win gold and share it like we shared our love, or neither of us would win it...

...I reached out with my foot and kicked her. "What the fuck???" she cried and punched me in the face. I felt blood swell in my nose as Larisa Ilchenko passed us, and I whispered to my beloved Cassie, "All for you my love, I did it for you..."

THE END